Call me Joseph

I am the proud father of three kids, if you can hang that description on three characters born in the early seventies. Or if you want me to be more specific I have a son and two daughters in the full throw of adulthood. So far so good.

When the story of my family turn to the really weird sector is that this gentlemen (father of a daughter on his own), and those two ladies (one mother of a boy and a girl, the other one convinced that she is the dotting mother of two English Bulldogs, no kidding!) are absolutely convinced that they are the result of immaculate conception! Yup all three of them.

Their minds, pretty astute in some very advanced area of either communication and cinematographic art, cardiac imaging, child rearing, trip planning, party throwing and other speculative and operative area comes to a screeching halt when the subject of their conception is broached.

They are not in any way, shape or form able to handle the concept that their creation was the result of sexual activity of two (very) consenting adults. No! No deal!

Any conversation coming even close to the subject is immediately interrupted by loud protest, covering of head and flat refusal to go there!

That is a little puzzling at the least.

For starter, I should know since I was there.

I also know that if my sweet and gentle spouse should have, at the time, started the conversation, some evening around the fireplace or the pool, by informing me that she had received the visit of an archangel and consequently was going to give birth to a child my first reaction would have been a good laugh. Upon her insistence the conversation would have taken a very interesting turn with me trying to find out what kind of stuff said sweet spouse had ingested, sniffed or smoked in the recent past. Thing going any further could have brought me to an early stage of planning of discovery of the location of the archangel with the goal of paying him a visit, in company of my favorite baseball bat, off course.

Any attempts to explain to my kids the error of their thinking as failed miserably and will I am afraid never reached a successful conclusion.

So…call me Joseph….. And NO I do not do cabinetry!

Good night.